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Sitting here in a crowded room, yet I'm alone. Or is it lonely? Whichever it is, the fact still remains that it's just me. I'm tired of restarting, so I've decided to stop quiting. Yup. That is all...

Transparent Moment

Transparent Moment: some days I just want to give up, let go.  Over whelmed with life. Frustrated by lost. Feelings of failure, not good enough, not deserving, and inadequate. I cry, loudly, hoping that the sounds would somehow drown out the noise that's between my ears, that reminds me I'm just human. Broken. I pray often and I trust God wholeheartedly. I know He hears me. I know that He has already ordered my steps and even still at times I have an emotional breakdown. I often remind myself that Christ lives in me. That I'm more than a conquer. That it's okay to cry but not to drown in my tears. That I have everything that I'll ever need in Him. He's my greater. I speak life to myself.

what are we?

I just want to share my life with you. Engage in intelligent meaningful conversation with you. I just want to know that I'm not in this alone. Even though some days all I feel is alone. What is living  life to the fullest? How can we occupy the same space without clouding each other's space? If my opinion or way of living does not fit into your concept of how things should be done, is that my fault? Will I no longer be able to enjoy our time together because I'm different? I guess time will tell...

I just want fear, anxiety, frustration and doubt to just go away. Get compressed in a boxed and carted into an inferno never to be experienced again. Even after you've won they still seem to creep into your existence. Just leave already. You're not welcomed here.

Just a thought

I didn't walk the dog today because I don't have one. I didn't kiss my mate good bye as they left for work because I don't have one. I didn't go and work at my perfect job, earning my six figures because I don't have one. Does that mean I'm not successful?

How do you define success?

Is it having perfect as a blood relative? I only ask because at times I find myself battling the voices in my head that try to convince me that I'm not good enough. I'm not pretty enough. I'm not strong enough. I'm not him. I'm not her. When all I ever wanted to be was Me, and for that to be okay. Am I alone? Am I the only one that sometimes feel my good enough is not enough? How do you define success?